those who say

the past is not dead, can
stop and smell the smoke
you keep saying
the past is not dead, well,
stop and smell the smoke
you keep on saying
the past is not even past, and
you keep saying

does anyone else get the impression that "Tom" does nothing else but sit around all day and watch over his myspace universe? Really. He's the ultimate Myspace whore. He probably continuosly checks it every 5 minutes. Kind of like me. Except he has like 100000000000 friends. Now I feel pathetic. Tear.


Currently listening :
Whatever and Ever Amen
By Ben Folds Five
Release date: By 18 March, 1997

I'm two quarters and a heart down

And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds
These words are all I have so I'll write them
So you need them just to get by


I think the cat is trying to take over my office.

Don't worry. I will prevail.

Yeah, I'm listening to Fall Out Boy. I know, I know. Its dumb but sometimes I can't help it. I admit it. I occasionally listen to crap.


Currently listening:
From Under the Cork Tree
by Fall Out Boy
Release Date: May 3, 2005

And so . . .

Annie waits, Annie waits, Annie waits
for a call from a friend
the same, it's the same,
why's it always the same?
Annie waits for the last time

the clock never stops,
never stops, never waits
she's growing old, it's getting late
and so he forgot,
he forgot, maybe not ..
maybe he's been seriously hurt
would that be worse?

headlights crest the hill
shadows pass her by and out of sight
Annie sees in dreams:
Friday bingo, pigeons in the park

Annie waits for the last time
just the same as the last time

Annie says, "You see?
this is why I'd rather be alone."

Sometimes, I begin to feel as if I am important. Then I think about what I've done.

And I wonder why?


Currently listening :
Rockin' the Suburbs
By Ben Folds
Release date: By 11 September, 2001

I want to glide through those brown eyes dreaming

Take you from the inside, baby hold on tight
You were so right when you said I've been drinking
What was I thinking when we said good night


Maybe my happy ending will come soon
Maybe I won't even know it
Maybe I'll try
to look to hard
And let it get away.

Maybe my shot will be next
maybe I can feel it
My turn to have
the completeness I see
of maybe my time has just not come.

You'll see my song as its sung
and hear my words as they're said
Or I'll keep it all to myself
and just call it mine instead.

Either way I know
or maybe I don't
but I've got to do something
and it has to be now
a shot in the dark
or a move to the light
anything is better
than nothing at all.

I always thought that if I held you tightly
You'd always love me like you did back then
Then I fell asleep in the city kept blinking
What was I thinking when I let you back in



Currently listening :
Yankee Hotel Foxtrot
By Wilco
Release date: By 23 April, 2002

The color of infinity

Inside an empty glass
I'm squinting my eye
And turning off and on and on
and off the light

It's for this experimental film
Which nobody knows about and which
I'm still figuring out what's going to go
In my experimental film

Yeah!
You're all gonna be in this experimental film
And even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it's

I already know the ending
It's the part that makes your face implode
I don't know what makes your face implode
But that's the way the movie ends

And in my experimental film
Which nobody knows about but which
I'm still figuring out
Your face implodes
In my experimental film

Yeah!
You're all gonna be in this experimental film
And even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it--
Even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it's

The color of infinity
Inside an empty glass
It's for this experimental film
Which nobody knows about and which
I'm still figuring out what's going to go
In my experimental film

Yeah!
You're all gonna be in this experimental film
And even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it's gonna--
Yeah, you're gonna be in this experimental film
And even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it--
Even though I can't explain it
I already know how great it's...

Oh what I would give for two more hours in the day. Or a computer that could render a two minute project in less than two hours.


Currently listening :
The Spine
By They Might Be Giants
Release date: By 13 July, 2004

The moonlight shined on forever

and your eyes shined over me

And just like the sun I am falling
and just like stars you will shine
and just like the sky will roll over
I'm asking for your heart tonight.

Its all that I can do
just standing next to you
beneath the stars as they shine


I love the bus . . . except when I miss the first one and have to wait 25 minutes for the second one. But thats not important.

I'm looking for someone who I can work with. Someone who can take constructive criticism and also give it out. Someone who can mold my ideas. Someone whose ideas I can mold. I need a person who doesn't need me to set a deadline for them, because they will set one themselves. I need someone who will meet my deadlines. Mostly though, I just need someone who is good at what they do.

This will be the best movie ever.


Currently listening :
...It's so Hard to Make a Sound
By The Rosevelts
Release date: By 12 September, 2000

I'm going to Graceland

She comes back to tell me she's gone
As if I didn't know that
As if I didn't know my own bed
As if I'd never noticed
The way she brushed her hair from her forehead
And she said losing love
Is like a window in your heart
Everybody sees you're blown apart
Everybody sees the wind blow

I can not stop chewing my fingernails. My reaction to stress is to quite literally destroy my body. And right now, I'm stressed. Jobs, money, stress. I've got options, but will I be doing myself right? Band, people, art. Will anyone come to the show? Do other people even like this music I love?


Currently listening :
Graceland
By Paul Simon
Release date: By 27 July, 2004

Cigarettes and chocolate milk

These are just a couple of my cravings
Everything it seems I like's a little bit stronger
A little bit thicker, a little bit harmful for me

If I should buy jellybeans
Have to eat them all in just one sitting
Everything it seems I like's a little bit sweeter
A little bit fatter, a little bit harmful for me

And then there's those other things
Which for several reasons we won't mention
Everything about 'em is a little bit stranger, a little bit
harder
A little bit deadly

It isn't very smart
Tends to make one part
So brokenhearted

Wow two blogs in like 10 minutes. I was just writing a message to someone and I had a very bloggable (I can't believe I just turned it into a verb) thought; so I had to put this up.

They tell you that you can do anything if you put your mind to it.
"Find something you love, something that will make you feel good about yourself at the end of the day"
You go through school with a dream.
Why doesn't anyone ever tell you the truth growing up?
I think back, and I wonder.
Why wasn't anyone there to say what would have really helped me?
"Collin, you are very smart. Don't waste your time with music. Go to school for finance or law. Don't you realize that you will have free time to do all the creative things you please?"
Your career isn't your life.
Your career is how you make money.
Your life is how you spend the rest of the time.
I realize this now, but it is too late.
I'm already in too deep.
Student loans and bills stop me from changing my course.
I fear I will never realize my full potential this way.


Currently listening :
Poses [Bonus Track]
By Rufus Wainwright
Release date: By 05 February, 2002

Could you tell me the next time that you're choking?

'Cause I'll rush right over
to shove some dirt right down your throat
It's nothing I have against you
You're just a creep and
you can't remember the last five years


Rendering is ruining my night.

Oh well, who needs sleep anyways. Sleep is for the weak. I will prevail.


Currently listening :
Through Being Cool
By Saves the Day
Release date: By 02 November, 1999

Because all

My feelings are more
Than i can let by
Or not
More than you've got
Just follow the day

Follow the day and reach for the sun!

I have the worst caffeine headache, but no caffeine.

What has my life come to.


Currently listening :
The Beginning Stages Of...
By The Polyphonic Spree
Release date: By 24 June, 2003

i know you may not want to see me

on your way down from the clouds
would you hear me if i told you
that my heart is with you now

she's only happy in the sun

did you find what you were after
the pain and the laughter brought
you to your knees
but if the sun sets you free
you'll be free indeed

she's only happy in the sun

every time i heard you laughing
it makes my cry
like the story of life
is hello goodbye

she's only happy in the sun


I probably haven't talked to you in a while. If you are one of my friends, I am sorry. If not, then it isn't my fault.

Groups of people can be scary sometimes.

People, in general, can overwhelm.

I want everyone to talk to me.

I'm afraid to talk to anyone.


Currently listening :
Diamonds on the Inside
By Ben Harper
Release date: By 11 March, 2003