Wanted to believe in all the words that I was speaking

As we moved together in the dark
And all the friends that I was telling
And all the playful misspellings
And every bite I gave you left a mark

Tiny vessels oozed into your neck
And formed the bruises
That you said you didn't want to fade
But they did and so did I that day

All I see are dark grey clouds
In the distance moving closer with every hour
So when you ask "was something wrong?"
That I think "you're damn right there is but we can't talk about it now.
No, we can't talk about it now."

So one last touch and then you'll go
And we'll pretend that it meant something so much more
But it was vile, and it was cheap
And you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me
Yeah you are beautiful but you don't mean a thing to me


I've decided to take on a self-assigned project. I'm not officially starting until January, but I'm writing it down now, so that I can't make excuses when the time comes. Over the course of next year I am going to write and record at least 52 songs, and from those, I will create 12 music videos. Thats a song every week, and a video every month. No excuses. Some of them might be bad, but they will be finished songs and videos, posted here on the blog weekly/monthly.

Also, as a first step, I'm going to redesign my entire site over the next couple weeks. I'm not sure when I'll actually get that done and uploaded, but its in the works.


Currently Listening to
Transatlanticism
by Death Cab for Cutie

If I squeeze my grape and I drink my wine

Coz if I squeeze my grape and I drink my wine
Oh coz nothing is lost, it's just frozen in frost,
And it's opening time, there's no-one in line

But I've still got me to be your open door,
I've still got me to be your sandy shore
I've still got me to cross your bridge in this storm
And I've still got me to keep you warm

Warmer than warm, yeah


Tonight, on my way home, I listened to the radio with the volume on 11. Very few people know what that means, but it is a pretty big leap, and it was kind of exciting to take it. It was also deflating, because I know that isn't the leap that I wanted.

EDIT TO ADD: It was too much. I went back to 6 this morning.

Currently Listening to
9
by Damien Rice

The last time we saw Amy

She was headed for the shore
Fighting off the volatile gray skies

She said now begins forever
And that no one knows their time
We bid farewell not knowing
That might be our last goodbye

Amy was a fighter
She cut like Casius Clay
She burned like a fire
Despite these rains

Where time was a question
She only knew one song
She's singing, "how far, how fast, how long?"

When everything stops moving
And I stop to catch my breath
And ride my train of thought
All the way round

My thoughts return to Amy
And the fire she's begun
She came when we were freezing
And left us burning up


I've realized that it is much easier to aim for stars that you are certain you can't reach than it is to follow a dream that you've worked for your whole life.


Currently Listening to
New Way To Be Human
by Switchfoot

The slow motion moves me

The monologue means nothing to me
Bored in the role, but he can't stop
Standing up to sit back down
Or lose the one thing found
Spinning the world like a toy top
'Til there's a ghost in every town
Can't make a sound

Eyes locked and shining
Can't you tell me what's happening?

Why should you want any other
When you're a world within a world?


The first thing to go is your sense of touch.


Currently Listening to
Figure 8
by Elliott Smith